Paint it Black-Amnesia 7 inch.
This record contains the phrase "duck season/rabbit season." It also has a song about riding bikes. I don't own a bike at the moment, but I like to think I will someday. The song about riding bikes has the coolest little driving guitar riff during the verses. I'm pretty sure there's a line about Mission of Burma too. It makes me smile.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
reviews of things
Capital-Blind Faith 7"
One time I had a dream. In that dream I had access to a time machine for some reason. Out of all the crevices of history I could have crept to, I chose to go back in time a year and a half to attend a Capital show that I was originally unable to attend due to work. I decided to wear a Capital shirt that did not exist at the time of the show just to weird the kids out. They played songs that had not been released at the time and I knew all of the words. I'm not entirely sure why I chose to do this. I could have gone to Ebbet's field. I could have gone to the prep school basketball game my grandparents met at. I could have gone to CBGB's to see the Talking Heads. I went to see Capital play a show. Go figure.
www.justaaudial.net
One time I had a dream. In that dream I had access to a time machine for some reason. Out of all the crevices of history I could have crept to, I chose to go back in time a year and a half to attend a Capital show that I was originally unable to attend due to work. I decided to wear a Capital shirt that did not exist at the time of the show just to weird the kids out. They played songs that had not been released at the time and I knew all of the words. I'm not entirely sure why I chose to do this. I could have gone to Ebbet's field. I could have gone to the prep school basketball game my grandparents met at. I could have gone to CBGB's to see the Talking Heads. I went to see Capital play a show. Go figure.
www.justaaudial.net
Monday, June 8, 2009
Letters that are fun to think of existing
Dear Trent,
Seriously?! Everyone in the world?! That's unhealthy, unethical, uncomfortable, illegal, and also physically impossible. I understand the need to do something that matters, but I hardly recommend fucking everyone in the world in order to accomplish that something. Also, if it's everyone in the world, wouldn't that make each act of fucking matter less and less? You'd be setting out to accomplish something and diminishing that accomplishment with every step towards it. Just saying.
your pal,
Matthew
Seriously?! Everyone in the world?! That's unhealthy, unethical, uncomfortable, illegal, and also physically impossible. I understand the need to do something that matters, but I hardly recommend fucking everyone in the world in order to accomplish that something. Also, if it's everyone in the world, wouldn't that make each act of fucking matter less and less? You'd be setting out to accomplish something and diminishing that accomplishment with every step towards it. Just saying.
your pal,
Matthew
one on one v.4
Iron Chic is a band from Long Island. There is a man named John Mee who plays bass in Iron Chic. I met up with John at the Iron Chic show at Mr. Beery's in Bethpage.
Me-I used to really like the Red Hot Chili Peppers...like...a lot.
John-Yeah man, Flea really likes the Lakers (the Lakers are a professional American basketball organization that Flea really likes).
Me-Anthony Keidis kind of sucks though.
John-Totally.
Me-He's always talking about driving a Lexus to Texas or some shit like that.
John-I heard he once thought that Mike Patton was secretly making fun of him.
Me-Ha. That rules. Thanks for sitting down to do this interview.
John-No problem. I like Bill Simmons (Bill Simmons is a man who writes for espn about sports. He is witty and informative).
Me-Bill Simmons rules. When his new book comes out we should go to his signing.
John-That is a wonderful idea.
Me-I used to really like the Red Hot Chili Peppers...like...a lot.
John-Yeah man, Flea really likes the Lakers (the Lakers are a professional American basketball organization that Flea really likes).
Me-Anthony Keidis kind of sucks though.
John-Totally.
Me-He's always talking about driving a Lexus to Texas or some shit like that.
John-I heard he once thought that Mike Patton was secretly making fun of him.
Me-Ha. That rules. Thanks for sitting down to do this interview.
John-No problem. I like Bill Simmons (Bill Simmons is a man who writes for espn about sports. He is witty and informative).
Me-Bill Simmons rules. When his new book comes out we should go to his signing.
John-That is a wonderful idea.
Monday, June 1, 2009
disappointing your parents and dying alone v.1
this appears in the new issue of rawlife zine. dr. drewce alexander asked me to do a little something about kiss.
What follows is a list of twenty one statements regarding the rock group Kiss. It is up to you to determine which statements are fact, and which are fiction. Good luck, I hope you make it.
1-The song "Christine Sixteen," written by Gene Simmons(bass) when he was twenty eight years old is about wanting to sleep with a sixteen year old girl (and most likely actually going through with it).
2-Lou Reed assisted in writing lyrics for the Kiss concept album Music From The Elder.
3-They have never manufactured any merchandise that would take away, or add to anyone's immediate impression of their music.
4-They were made for lovin' you.
5-The deep cut "Hard Times," from the album Dynasty was covered by the New York hard rock group the Cro-mags.
6-They'd like you to lick it up, whoa.
7-Cold gin is the only thing that keeps them together.
8-Their drummer's name is Peter Criss(drums) and he wore make-up to make him look like a cat.
9-Peter Criss(drums) is the proud father of several well adjusted, successful children who love him very much.
10-They set out to record their third full-length record with Steve Albini, but later scrapped the session tapes.
11-They are all handsome.
12-They have toured with Aerosmith.
13-The seventies were a pretty fucked up decade.
14-They starred in a film about a phantom in an amusement park that involved evil robot thems.
15-Some of the band members originally performed under the name Wicked Lester.
16-No one has ever dressed up as Kiss for Halloween.
17-Ace Frehley(lead guitar) died in a motorcycle accident while crossing the Brooklyn Bridge into Manhattan on October 17th, 1987.
18-Gene Simmons(bass) has never consumed an illegal drug, or an alcoholic beverage in his entire life.
19-Paul Stanley(rhythm guitar) once performed in a side project called The Dudes of Wrath.
20-Paul Stanley(rhythm guitar) is an accomplished painter. People buy his paintings.
21-In a film documentary featuring candid interviews with each band member, it is revealed that Peter Criss(drums) heard somewhere that some of their fans believe that they as a band, collectively do not use heat.
Let's see how well you scored.
Factual statements were:1,2,4,6,7,8,12,13,14,15,18,19, 20
What follows is a list of twenty one statements regarding the rock group Kiss. It is up to you to determine which statements are fact, and which are fiction. Good luck, I hope you make it.
1-The song "Christine Sixteen," written by Gene Simmons(bass) when he was twenty eight years old is about wanting to sleep with a sixteen year old girl (and most likely actually going through with it).
2-Lou Reed assisted in writing lyrics for the Kiss concept album Music From The Elder.
3-They have never manufactured any merchandise that would take away, or add to anyone's immediate impression of their music.
4-They were made for lovin' you.
5-The deep cut "Hard Times," from the album Dynasty was covered by the New York hard rock group the Cro-mags.
6-They'd like you to lick it up, whoa.
7-Cold gin is the only thing that keeps them together.
8-Their drummer's name is Peter Criss(drums) and he wore make-up to make him look like a cat.
9-Peter Criss(drums) is the proud father of several well adjusted, successful children who love him very much.
10-They set out to record their third full-length record with Steve Albini, but later scrapped the session tapes.
11-They are all handsome.
12-They have toured with Aerosmith.
13-The seventies were a pretty fucked up decade.
14-They starred in a film about a phantom in an amusement park that involved evil robot thems.
15-Some of the band members originally performed under the name Wicked Lester.
16-No one has ever dressed up as Kiss for Halloween.
17-Ace Frehley(lead guitar) died in a motorcycle accident while crossing the Brooklyn Bridge into Manhattan on October 17th, 1987.
18-Gene Simmons(bass) has never consumed an illegal drug, or an alcoholic beverage in his entire life.
19-Paul Stanley(rhythm guitar) once performed in a side project called The Dudes of Wrath.
20-Paul Stanley(rhythm guitar) is an accomplished painter. People buy his paintings.
21-In a film documentary featuring candid interviews with each band member, it is revealed that Peter Criss(drums) heard somewhere that some of their fans believe that they as a band, collectively do not use heat.
Let's see how well you scored.
Factual statements were:1,2,4,6,7,8,12,13,14,15,18,19, 20
Friday, May 15, 2009
Letters that are fun to think of existing
Dear Dark Man,
Do you still say "somethin' new," before you perform the Ruff Ryder's Anthem? Also, what's with the duct tape and rape stuff?
Sincerely,
A concerned citizen
ps. I have not bounced in a long time. It was good to do it again. Thanks for that.
Do you still say "somethin' new," before you perform the Ruff Ryder's Anthem? Also, what's with the duct tape and rape stuff?
Sincerely,
A concerned citizen
ps. I have not bounced in a long time. It was good to do it again. Thanks for that.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
reviews of things
The Bouncing Souls 20th Anniversary Tour
At The Crazy Donkey
I wasn't going to go to this show. After working all day, I decided it might be fun to see a show that some people I like might be hanging out at. I called the Crazy Donkey to see if it was sold out. It was not sold out. I fed my dog, found my sneakers, and headed over to the show.
When I pulled into the parking lot this fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear signaled for me to roll down my window. I rolled down my window. "It's five dollars to park today," said this fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear. I asked, "Is it sold out?" I did not really want to pay five dollars to be told by some other fella wearing one of those shitty black hats that I couldn't even get into the show. The parking lot fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear sort of rolled his eyes as if to say, "There's no fucking way this show is going to sell out, this kid is a chump." He then said to me, "There's no fucking way this show is going to sell out, chump." I paid him five dollars and drove my car through the official parking lot, past a fence, onto a gravel pit covered in gravel, weeds, sticks, and broken beer bottles. This was the "special event" parking area.
Four different cars were blasting the Bro Hymn by Pennywise as I exited my car and walked back to the venue. I paid a lady with streaks in her hair twenty American dollars. I was asked by a security guard to empty the contents of my pockets and spread my arms out. This guard inspected my cell phone, cigarettes, lighter, and wallet. He then patted me down fairly thoroughly. I was wearing an old, faded New York Mets hat. The security guard removed this hat from my head to make sure I was not hiding drugs, weapons, or drug/weapon combos underneath it. It sucked because I don't have the best hair in general and it had been under a hat for about an hour and there's not much of it left to begin with. He took that hat off and it was all over the place and weird. Two other security guards snickered.
After getting my hat back I walked in and said hello to the people I knew there. I shook hands. I hugged. I said "hey, what's up?" to at least six people, possibly more. Some band was playing. Then some other band played. My brother and his friend showed up. We laughed at shit. I drank certain beverages. My brother is a fan of The Loved Ones and I am a fan of possible Joe Strummer covers; so we headed inside the venue to watch The Loved Ones. The Loved Ones had arranged it so that the song "Rainy Day Women #12 and #35" by Bob Dylan played over the PA system while they walked onstage. Right as Dylan finished the line "everybody must get stoned." The Loved Ones began playing their instruments. They began playing their songs shortly thereafter.
I don't know much about The Loved Ones besides the fact that they cover Springsteen and Joe Strummer. Their songs weren't half bad. A couple of kids started running into each other so I started running in place. A couple of kids didn't like that so I started doing push-ups. Another kid started doing push-ups. A kid tried to pick my legs up while I was doing push-ups, but I kicked at him and he stopped. I started doing push-ups again. I got bored with doing push-ups. I started doing jumping jacks. A couple of kids grabbed me and said, "This is hilarious man, right on." A couple of other kids grabbed me and said, "You're a fucking faggot." The singer of The Loved Ones said, "We're going to do a cover song now...it's by one of my favorite songwriters of all time, Conor Oberst." Considering The Loved Ones cover Springsteen and Joe Strummer and listen to Bob Dylan when they walk onstage, this choice of cover and statement makes no sense to me. I rubbed my stomach while patting myself on the head for a little bit. Then I switched hands. Some kid kept trying to knock my hat off of my head. I was not going to have my dreaded scalp exposed again. This kid did not succeed. Some other kid "moshed" into me on "accident" and the hat knocking kid high fived him. I walked closer to them and laughed hysterically. The mosher kid shoved me. It was funny. Some kids pulled him away from me and told him not to stoop to my level. I have no clue what my level is.
After all that, The Bouncing Souls played a whole bunch of songs. They did a slowed down cover of The Misfits' "Hybrid Moments." They covered The Cure. They played all of the old songs you could want to hear. Their singer sure looks really drunk whenever I see them. I like them.
At The Crazy Donkey
I wasn't going to go to this show. After working all day, I decided it might be fun to see a show that some people I like might be hanging out at. I called the Crazy Donkey to see if it was sold out. It was not sold out. I fed my dog, found my sneakers, and headed over to the show.
When I pulled into the parking lot this fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear signaled for me to roll down my window. I rolled down my window. "It's five dollars to park today," said this fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear. I asked, "Is it sold out?" I did not really want to pay five dollars to be told by some other fella wearing one of those shitty black hats that I couldn't even get into the show. The parking lot fella wearing one of those shitty black hats all the kids wear sort of rolled his eyes as if to say, "There's no fucking way this show is going to sell out, this kid is a chump." He then said to me, "There's no fucking way this show is going to sell out, chump." I paid him five dollars and drove my car through the official parking lot, past a fence, onto a gravel pit covered in gravel, weeds, sticks, and broken beer bottles. This was the "special event" parking area.
Four different cars were blasting the Bro Hymn by Pennywise as I exited my car and walked back to the venue. I paid a lady with streaks in her hair twenty American dollars. I was asked by a security guard to empty the contents of my pockets and spread my arms out. This guard inspected my cell phone, cigarettes, lighter, and wallet. He then patted me down fairly thoroughly. I was wearing an old, faded New York Mets hat. The security guard removed this hat from my head to make sure I was not hiding drugs, weapons, or drug/weapon combos underneath it. It sucked because I don't have the best hair in general and it had been under a hat for about an hour and there's not much of it left to begin with. He took that hat off and it was all over the place and weird. Two other security guards snickered.
After getting my hat back I walked in and said hello to the people I knew there. I shook hands. I hugged. I said "hey, what's up?" to at least six people, possibly more. Some band was playing. Then some other band played. My brother and his friend showed up. We laughed at shit. I drank certain beverages. My brother is a fan of The Loved Ones and I am a fan of possible Joe Strummer covers; so we headed inside the venue to watch The Loved Ones. The Loved Ones had arranged it so that the song "Rainy Day Women #12 and #35" by Bob Dylan played over the PA system while they walked onstage. Right as Dylan finished the line "everybody must get stoned." The Loved Ones began playing their instruments. They began playing their songs shortly thereafter.
I don't know much about The Loved Ones besides the fact that they cover Springsteen and Joe Strummer. Their songs weren't half bad. A couple of kids started running into each other so I started running in place. A couple of kids didn't like that so I started doing push-ups. Another kid started doing push-ups. A kid tried to pick my legs up while I was doing push-ups, but I kicked at him and he stopped. I started doing push-ups again. I got bored with doing push-ups. I started doing jumping jacks. A couple of kids grabbed me and said, "This is hilarious man, right on." A couple of other kids grabbed me and said, "You're a fucking faggot." The singer of The Loved Ones said, "We're going to do a cover song now...it's by one of my favorite songwriters of all time, Conor Oberst." Considering The Loved Ones cover Springsteen and Joe Strummer and listen to Bob Dylan when they walk onstage, this choice of cover and statement makes no sense to me. I rubbed my stomach while patting myself on the head for a little bit. Then I switched hands. Some kid kept trying to knock my hat off of my head. I was not going to have my dreaded scalp exposed again. This kid did not succeed. Some other kid "moshed" into me on "accident" and the hat knocking kid high fived him. I walked closer to them and laughed hysterically. The mosher kid shoved me. It was funny. Some kids pulled him away from me and told him not to stoop to my level. I have no clue what my level is.
After all that, The Bouncing Souls played a whole bunch of songs. They did a slowed down cover of The Misfits' "Hybrid Moments." They covered The Cure. They played all of the old songs you could want to hear. Their singer sure looks really drunk whenever I see them. I like them.
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